Having spent the last 5 months with a nutritionist and taking glisulin for my insulin resistance, then having November and December not work out for AI because of the Panamanian public holidays, the first round of AI was kind of nerve racking.  So much planning to get here, but am I really ready to be here?

January 11: started with 5 days of taking Provera pills.  Worried that my period would be horrid at the end of it, because it’s supposed to make you clean the whole uterus out.

January 16: period arrived, with cramps and not feeling so good, but not as bad as I had imagined it would be.

January 18:  called the doctor to find out “what’s next?”, given instructions for 6.30 a.m. on Tuesday

January 19: 6.30 a.m. – lab test; 2.30 p.m. ultrasound.  4 possible ovules forming. Got injected (in the stomach) with hormones, and given an injection to give myself the next day.

January 21: 6.30 a.m. – lab test; 1.30 p.m. ultrasound. 4 possible ovules forming + 2 small ones and getting larger.  Reduced amount of the hormones, but still injecting myself in the stomach.

January 23: 10.30 a.m. ultrasound, 12 possible ovules forming and 2 largest ones from Thursday have “disappeared”

January 25:  6.30 a.m. blood test, afternoon ultrasound. 4 decent possible ovules for insemination.  New injection for 8.00 p.m., in the leg muscle, to be administered by me.  Called mum at 8.00 p.m., and had her “hold my hand” while I injected myself with her talking to me on the phone.  Not half as bad as I had expected.

January 27:  had to be at my AI appointment at 8.30 a.m.  Not used to the early morning traffic. Planned to get there at 8.00 a.m., but didn’t get ready early enough.  Left home at 7.50 a.m., and got stuck in the 8.00 a.m. traffic.  Arrived at the doctor’s at 8.20 a.m., and Alessandro was already quite stressed.  Doctor already waiting for me, together with the nurses.  Feeling stressed just from being late and stuck in traffice.  Quick change into hospital gear (out-patient clinici) and up into the saddle.  Over and done with before you could believe it, and the doctor was out of there.  The nurse instructed me to stay there for 15-20 minutes and then just a normal day in the office, with AI already taken care of.  “Much ado about nothing”

January 28:  back to the doctor’s office at 6.00 p.m. (having had a really busy day and almost forgotten about the appointment).  Got a bag with 14 injections to be given.  Thick oily injections.  In the butt.  Cannot give them to myself – have to get someone else to do it. Nurse in the doctor’s surgery gave me the first one.  Incredibly painful.

January 29: 2nd injection – did it at the 24-hour emergency clinic – nurse is an expert!  Hardly felt it., and so went back for the rest of the injections.  Some days it hurts, some days it doesn’t.

February 6:  curiosity is setting in.  My breasts are heavy and really tender.  I feel bloated.  Dreamt last night that i was pregnant with twins.  Guess that’s what is really on my mind and plaguing me, even in my sleep.  Am I pregnant? What I’ve read on the internet says implantation takes place 7-12 days after insemination.  Monday the 8th = day 12.  But doctor said not to do the test until Wednesday the 10th (day 14).  Why do I have to wait?  Talked to Alessandro about it – he says wait.

February 8: talk to mum about the test – she agrees with A & the dr – wait until Wednesday.  So, just got the injection.

February 9: go to get my injection, it’s 9 p.m., day 13.  My breasts weigh a TON.  This is worse than the day before my period arrives!   What’s the difference of a day?  Get the test done.  Take the results home and wait for A to get home.  We opened the envelope and the result was NEGATIVE.  I wanted to ball my eyes out, but I had already read that AI only has a 5-20% chance of working, so it was not guaranteed.  And, on top of that, the doctor HAD said to wait till day 14.  And I have HORRIBLE cramps, even down into my thighs. Guess my period is coming and with a vengeance from all these injections.  Even so, will do another test tomorrow.

February 10:  busy all morning, and couldn’t get to the lab to do the test. Not feeling very motivated to do it, since I already “know” what the result is going to be. Finally got there after lunch, and they said the test would be ready for 7.30 p.m.  I explained to the lab tech that 7.30 p.m. was no good, and I really needed it before 4.00 in order to see the doctor.  She said to call in an hour and a half.  I got back to work and got busy and forgot, and when I remembered 2 hours had already gone by and it was already 4.00.  Called and they patched me through to the technician, who said that the test read 29, when the minimum for a positive is 25.  According to him, definitely a result to discuss with the doctor, because while it was on the positive side, I didn’t have enough HCG in my bloodstream as I should.  So, not to get my hopes up. Called the doctor’s surgery and got told to get right over there.  Appointment or no appointment, he would fit me in.

When I got to the doctor’s he was all smiles and said “there’s no such thing as ‘slightly pregnant’.”

That, I guess, is why it pays to follow the doctor’s instructions, even when it disagrees with what you’ve just read on the internet.  Why is Alessandro “right”?  Why is Mum right? hmmmphhhh.  Guess I will have to learn to follow instructions.

So it was a definite YES, but now I have to look after myself.  Since I mentioned that I had had terrible cramps the day before (which was the day the embryo was implanting), he prescribed 15 more of those horrid injections!  So, I have another 15 days of putting up with a black-and-blue butt.

After the doctor’s I called Alessandro, and he was a little shocked, given that Tuesday result had been NEGATIVE.  I mean, he had had to put up with my sad face and close to tears (definitely a little hormonal).  A little bit of the “are you sure?”.   But definitely sure!

February  12: Still feel like a burning sensation in my abdomen, but the doctor says not to worry about it.  It’s not pain or discomfort, but “feels weird”.  So, putting it down to all the hormones and everything that are changing in my body.

Took Susy & Mercedes for a walk this morning.  We hadn’t been for a walk in weeks, since I started this whole trip (not enough hours in the day).  We’ve just been playing catch on the basketball court all these weeks.  Felt wonderful to be back out in the world again walking the dogs.  Plan to repeat it tomorrow.

Now… to get through the next few months.